Updated: Jul 29, 2019
How often do you find yourself happy with where you are? I mean, really happy with yourself, your relationships, your work, and your day-to-day world? When you're in a space of non-judgment and acceptance of all things?
How often do you remain in the present moment without wanting or needing to be anywhere or anyone else? We all talk about living in the now and enjoying our current self and surroundings, but how many of us actually do that?
So much of our lives are spent waiting for some future versions of ourselves; we're always wanting to be slightly different, to rid ourselves of the "negative" qualities, to get over our own issues and baggage so we can be healed and renewed, but do we ever take the time to see what blessings this current version of ourselves is offering us?
What if we just honored this space, right now, as much as we praise the person we wish to become?
I've been thinking about this a lot lately as I find that I judge myself pretty harshly for wanting to just be as I am right now.
Who am I right now?
I am both the seeker of liberation and the pioneer of connection.
I long for adventure and yet my heart is pulling me inward.
I crave soulful interactions yet find myself settling for less than.
I strive to be better every day but still indulge in laziness.
I want more personal success yet spend my time engaging in habits that don't serve that pursuit.
I love my alone time but can sometimes feel lonely.
I want more time for me and yet I fill my schedule with time for others.
I explore pleasure in all its guises and yet discontent often follows.
I trust in myself and yet have difficulty trusting others.
I want something that is hard to explain yet is completely describable.
I know needed change is broadening on the horizon and yet my fear wants to keep me constrained.
I am in between two worlds.
One keeps me safe, guarded and forever protected. This world is ruled by my fear.
The other is of great transformation, growth and awakening. This world is governed by my heart.
I don't need to be confined to just one or the other. I don't need to judge myself for placing a foot in both landscapes.
I am free to flow within and without my own inner worlds.
I am free to be me, exactly as I am, right now.
A woman neither here, nor there, but lovingly in between.