I've been a really ungrateful and judgmental bit*h lately.
There, I said it. I wasn't going to share that & admit it, because by creating & running a wellness brand like Struck Inside Out, I sometimes feel like I need to present myself in such a way of "having it all together," or at least not labeling myself as judgmental or bitchy.
But, that's what I've been & that’s where I’m at. And you know, it’s totally okay to feel this way & admit it. I think we need to normalize the lows of being human - the not so pretty parts that we conceal in our pursuit of perfection. (Especially on Instagram).
Those not so pretty parts are actually quite beautiful when you really look at them. It’s like delicately unraveling a knotted chain. Sometimes when you first begin working your fingers at the entanglement, the chain becomes more tightly bound. You try to find the root of the knot, but as you move things around, it seems harder to fix. Then, as you loosen control & slowly work at the tether, it seems to sort itself out.
Our emotions are the same way. Sometimes the harder we try to “fix” ourselves & unravel the knotted core within us, we make things worse. We try to shove positivity & gratitude quotes down our throats until we’re robotically spewing someone else’s theories and How-To-Heal methods, that we’re not fully present in our bodies. We’re not feeling some of the essential parts of being human.
Anger. Frustration. Sadness. Judgment. Grief.
These are not things to shy away from, my love. They have their purposes, too. They teach us as much as happiness & gratitude do. The more you can let yourself feel the amazing & intricate emotions within you, even if they don’t feel “good,” you’re allowing yourself to be fully present to the human experience - the very reason why you’re here!
I’m not encouraging you to wallow in negativity, rather I’m pushing you toward feeling what you need to feel, & then choosing what you want to feel. Sometimes you need to experience lower vibrational emotions to reach higher ones.
It’s all ebbs & flow & highs & lows, & it will forever be that way. And that’s really beautiful when you can welcome the mystery of this life we’re all sharing.
Sending you love, always x.