36 Lessons, 36 Years

Today I turn 36! I want to pause here and honor what this year, and these years, have quietly taught me.

Not all of these lessons arrived wrapped in clarity. Some came through pain, others through joy, many through stillness and time. But each one brought me closer to myself - and for that, I’m grateful.

Here are 36 things I’ve learned so far, and maybe they’ll mean something to you, too.

1. Time keeps moving faster. The only way I know how to slow it down is to be more present. To feel what’s happening while it’s happening, to notice the light on the wall, to try new things, to listen with real attention.

2. The older I get, the more peace I feel. Not because everything is figured out, but because I’m less interested in proving and more interested in being.

    

3. Some mornings I catch myself worrying about the changes in my face, the small ways time is showing up. But I won’t shame myself for aging. Aging means I’m still here. Still learning. Still becoming. That’s something to hold with reverence.

    

4. Certain people I thought would be in my life forever slowly disappeared. And while it hurt, I can see now how their absence created space for me to grow in ways I might not have otherwise. I can still send them love, even from far away.

    

5. Forgiveness doesn’t always happen quickly. But I’ve learned that when it arrives, in pieces, over time, it’s not really for them, it’s for me. It’s what softens the grip of the past.

    

6. I used to drink on weekends, and there were definitely good memories. But nearly 300 days without alcohol has brought a deeper sense of calm and joy than any glass of wine ever could. My body feels safe now.

    

7. I thought my life would look different by now. I thought I’d possibly be married. Maybe a full-time author. But what’s here is more beautiful than what I imagined. And it’s because I let go of the plan and trusted the path.

    

8. Family means everything to me. I don’t take a single moment with them for granted.

    

9. Waking up early and taking time for myself before the world asks anything of me has changed my life. That quiet space is where I meet myself fully.

    

10. Sunlight and fresh air often shift something in me that nothing else can. Nature is the gentlest healer.

     

11. Eight hours of sleep is the difference between feeling okay and feeling like myself. Rest is sacred.

     

12. I love being alone. I don’t get FOMO anymore when I choose solitude. I know what I’m gaining :)

     

13. Reading has become one of my greatest joys. It helps me think more clearly, speak more intentionally, and write more honestly. Books have saved me in quiet ways.

     

14. Who you spend time with matters. It shapes the way you think, how you see the world, and how you see yourself. I’ve learned to be more intentional with who I let in.

     

15. Sometimes I think I’ve healed something and then it resurfaces again - the same pattern, the same ache. But now I see it as another invitation. A deeper layer. Not a failure, just more room to grow.

     

16. Every experience - even the ones that cracked me open - has taught me something valuable. Life really is a teacher, if I let it be.

     

17. If you show up every day and stay close to your vision, it adds up. It builds. That’s how dreams become real. Slowly, but surely.

     

18. Playing harmless pranks on friends, family, and coworkers is still one of my favorite things. Shared laughter is medicine. It keeps us light. It keeps us young.

     

19. However you choose to see yourself, your relationships, and your life - that’s how you’re going to experience them. The lens becomes the story. It’s always been about perspective.

     

20. I believe in myself. Other people can, and that’s wonderful, but the version that really matters is the one where I cheer myself on.

     

21. The only way I’ve made peace with fear is by walking directly into it. I used to be terrified of public speaking. Now I get excited! It energizes me. Fear fades when you meet it with movement.

     

22. Fresh flowers in my home are one of my favorite simple joys. There’s something healing about them, like they carry beauty without effort and remind me to do the same.

     

23. The future often looks darker in our imagination than it actually is. But life tends to surprise us with our own strength. I’ve learned I’m rarely as alone or unprepared as I fear I’ll be.

     

24. God, the Universe, Love, whatever name you use, has become a daily companion for me. When I stay close to that presence, life feels softer, more miraculous, more whole.

     

25. One of the most powerful prayers I’ve ever said is: “God, please show me the truth of…” And the answers always come.

     

26. Gut instincts are sacred. They’ve never led me wrong. Our bodies are gifts - wise, ancient, and more attuned than we give them credit for. When I trust mine, life flows.

     

27. The people who trigger me the most often reflect parts of myself I haven’t fully accepted or healed. They offer an invitation, not to judge more harshly, but to love more deeply.

     

28. Dreams don’t manifest just by thinking or talking about them. Years can go by that way. The only way they become real is through small, consistent steps. Little by little turns into a lot.

     

29. I used to care so much about social media numbers. Likes, views, shares. But now I care more about the energy behind what I’m doing. The impact. The honesty. That’s what matters.

     

30. I’ve learned that whatever I’m doing - no matter how small or big - if I give it my full presence, life starts to shift in ways I never could’ve planned.

     

31. Whenever I find myself stuck in a rut or caught in judgment or boredom, I remember that death is the greatest teacher. One day I won’t be here. So if today was my last - how would I choose to live these hours?

     

32. When I focus on making more money or wishing I had more, I stop and look at what I already have - the things money can’t buy - and I remember how deeply rich I truly am.

     

33. Helping others is what it all comes down to. That’s why we’re here. Every time I forget that, I feel lost. Every time I remember, I feel home again.

     

34. When someone shows you who they are - again and again - believe them. It’s not my job to fix or rescue anyone. Healing is a choice, and it has to come from within.

     

35. Romantic relationships can be the most beautiful and painful experiences we have. They show us all the ways we’ve protected ourselves, all the places that still need healing. It’s scary, but if you let it - it can also be a doorway to deeper love, with them and with yourself.

     

36. I’ve learned that I’ll always be learning. And that’s okay. There’s no final version of me, no finished product. Just this - this breath, this season, this soft unfolding. And that is more than enough.

     

If any of these lessons spoke to you, I hope you hold them close. They’re hard-earned.

And they’re yours too.

With so much love,

Danielle